I’m Not From Here

“I’m not from here please help me out
I didn’t grow up around here
Is it my eyes that give me away?
Or is it just the tears?”

These are lyrics from a Sondre Lerche song. I found him again this morning and decided to listen to him while getting ready for the day. I was nervous this morning and his soothing sudo jazz soothed my mood. Today was the first day of classes at Berklee for the fall. I have all sorts of hesitation about this semester, for reasons I know, and some things I don’t know. There’s this gut feeling that this isn’t what I want – but like my boyfriend says, I usually find the flaws all around me and concentrate on them till it makes me sick. So, I’m trying my best to approach this with an open mind, heart and arms. I’ll let people in. I’ll push myself in classes I don’t like. I’ll go out and try new things. This is what life is for, especially at my age, and in this city. So.. I don’t know what that will really look like quite yet, but here’s goes something.

So, Boston. I didn’t like it the last go around, but as I said.. new outlook. I just don’t know it the way that I knew Seattle. But Seattle captured me, and I went way out of my way to learn it, get lost in it’s amazing depths. I feel like Boston is so 21+ that I can’t explore it’s best parts.. but that really isn’t too true. My new (and quite wonderful) roommate is helping me to find other places. So it’ll be good. The weather is being nice for the most part and I plan on enjoying that for as long as I possibly can. And I’ve been having a lot of fun cooking dinner for David and I. I feel really domestic, but it’s a form of art for me. I like to make something and then immediately consume the product of it. Hahaha… I’ll do that till I get that fancy camera I dream of.

So, one day down….. 15 weeks to go.